Virunthombal

Virunthombal is one of the athigaaram under Aram in the great sage Valluvan‘s Thirukural. Two of the kurals that have my attention this time in this athigaaram 9 is as follows:

Kural 89

Udaimaiyul inmai virunthombal oamba
Madamai madavaarkan undu

Exp: selvanilayil ulla varumai enbathu, virumthombalai poatraathe ariyaamaiyaagum. Athu arivilligalidam ullathaagam

Even the host is a rich person, a guest will find them poor when the host does not know how to serve their guest. Even there are 101 food items that being offered to the guest, having a host who doesn’t know how to serve is equivalent to no dish at all. Valluvar says that you will find this quality of those who are illiterate.

A happy guest will find it so fulfilling to even drink just a glass of plain water when the host serve the drink with love and happy face.

Kural 90

Moapak kulaiyum anicham mugarnthirundhu
Nokak kulaiyum virunthu

Exp: anicham poo mogarthavudan vaadividum;athupol mugam malaraamal vaerupattu nokkiyavudan vurunthinar vaadi nirpar

Most of us from Tamil medium would have learned this kural during school time. Guest will feel sad when they are hosted without happiness in their face by the host.

We understand that time and effort is a concern when every one of us is working and trying to juggle with our day to day life. However, we have our own culture and ethics that needs to be maintained. When we are throwing a party/event at home, it is important that we do everything we can to entertain and serve our guest the best possible. It doesn’t have to be a lavish food or costly environment. The only concern that mattered most is how a guest being served. I am afraid we focus too much on the arrangement until the guest being neglected or left alone to entertain themselves.

Naan Padithathil....

Books has been my companion mostly when i travel and during waiting time. There were time when i even don't lift my eye to other direction for the whole journey of 1 hour plus in the bus. There were also a craze when i don't even waste my time when stop for traffic light or stuck in a long jam to pay toll. My interest was mostly on novels for entertainment purpose previously but i picked up this habit of reading for information. Any source of information which can benefit my knowledge will be kept carefully until i fully read and understand / digest the content. You may see that one of the must buy items in the list when we travel is book and must visit place is a bookshop.

Recently, I received a gift of  home-guide book set which i feel so lucky to have those books in my collection. Since very busy with festival prep, i managed to check out only one of the book ( i have not finish reading it still )and i thought i must share this with you. The reason is , if you happen to come across this book, you might consider buying it...worse come worse if not for you , it will be a good basic guide for ur gal. i think it may also be a good gift for newly married woman.

This book was published by Australian Women Weekly and it has A--Z everything that a person should know about household. From the type of knife that you shud buy to the type of oils and their use to how to cut a meat and what are those spices  and how to keep ur fridge or clean the stains...everything is laid down in the book. Maybe i will share some info in near future for the reading benefit.

R.E.A.L Gift

Years are passing and more grey hairs remind us how was the childhood life ,student life, college life and so on. But the significant drastic change feeling comes when you always want to recall how differently things were done when you were younger when you see another child doing the same thing now. How different was parenting back then compared to today's parenting and how different childhood back then.

No comments on how technology has influenced the change, it will be a never-ending-story. You cant stop how things are being done now because the methodology has changed. At the age of 3, i barely knew an alphabet, maybe just know how to shake to my favourite music. But nowadays, at the same age 3, a child can start do basic mathematics! The comparison could do good and means the same if you compare your generation with the earlier one.

Talking on the same gap, there are things that nowadays we see  common among young parents. I have read recently, that today's parents try to buy their children happiness with "expensive" gifts. This is in a way, is a token for the time that the parents can't spare with their children. It's already too frequent nowadays, media highlighting this as a spreading attitude that might not show healthy sign. A common view at houses, toys are scattered everywhere , which every generation had experienced anyway!. Observing closely, each toys, are not cheap ones that you may find in any toy stores. Expensive ones, some even tagged with original branding, which could have cost the parents RM 100 or more.

The point is, why are we being ignorant on the expenditure and be blinded with these kind of expenses when we are aware that children cant understand the actual worth of the gifts? Why we keep buying things with so much of value when we know that the next day, each part of the toys, might have been resembled?

What are we trying to achieve by doing this? The children are being pampered the way they wanted, presented with all kind of gifts that they insisted. No, giving excuse that they are being adamant of wanting the toy will not work. We could have been the same adamant kid years back. But our parents were able to say a big NO to us, which make us to be persistent on achieving our goal by saving our own money to buy it if we REALLY want the toy. The case is totally different now. We are teaching our kids that they can get what they want by being adamant. The appreciation value for the gifts have dropped down the lane. No matter how much money you spend for that, from the child's point of view, its just a number and paper that being offered to the sales person in return for the toy. is this how we want our child to grow without knowing how much you have suffered, mentally or physically just for the same note.

We are training our children to accept no NO . And even if they get that answer surprisingly in one fine day, they will know what to do to make the NO to YES.

Please be awake. We are not preparing our children to face the worst in future , if anything happens, but we are spoiling our children . Yes, at this age, they might not understand the worth of money, but at this same age, their brain is being trained on thinking and being shaped on the personality. We need to mould a kind and considerate child , not an adamant and spoiled kid.

We are being exposed to so many thing now compared to last time. We have all the facility to make a difference to the world. We have to to shape our child to use their REAL gift from GOD. They are gifted with a healthy 6 sense , then teach them how they can be considerate to down syndrome children. They are gifted to see , to hear, to speak, to feel , then make them to make see how their peers are suffering on the other part of the world , make our kid to talk about sympathy, do thinking how they can help those suffering the plight.

Yes, our kids might be young for all these, but they are not. We are sending our kids to Kumon at this same age. When we teach them to be adamant, we also can teach them to be kind. The same RM100 can be helpful to somebody suffering in nature disaster or  buy good food for other kids who are suffering in hunger. Imagine a 100 dollar note that lying as a resembled toy in your living room and the same 100 is feeding a hungry child.  Please train our child to see the world as how the world is then to compare themselves with their peers attending English reading class or Arts class. Get them to do a simple charity with some portion of their allocated gift money. Bring them the satisfaction of doing this, so that they will start doing it without you asking them to do.

Being said so, i am not a supporter of those who cut their birthday cake at welfare home. We shouldn't be there to show that we are fortunate to celebrate our birthday with loved ones , and you choose to doing it together with  less fortunate ones. Please do not carry do this. Children with special needs, will be happy that someone choose to share their happiness with them but at the same, you are doing more hurt to the child's heart, to wonder "why them"?

I have write long enough. It's keep playing in mind, why we are so blind. I noticed so many incidents at Deepavali shopping spree and cant stop relating how can the same "unnecessary" shopping money can be helpful to those in need. Right at this point of time , there could be many kids, dying due to hunger,  or being a child labour at the same factory that we buying fire crackers.

Let us teach our children to share their gift - the Real GIFT that GOD has presented them..

My two cents!